Huh?  What’s that? Healthy Chow, are you making up words again?

Are these the questions you’re asking yourself right now after reading the title of my blog post?  Well, I wouldn’t be surprised if you said yes.  I, too, was wondering just what in the heck was ‘chaordic flow’ when I saw the class listed on my yoga studio’s schedule.  It certainly intrigued me, but since the class was being held at a time when I usually don’t practice, I didn’t think too much more about it.  However, when my own schedule went a bit topsy-turvy last week due to my cold, I had to tinker with my usual routine.  I wasn’t feeling so hot on Wednesday morning, but by Wednesday night, I felt well enough to attend a yoga class.  The only class that was available on Wednesday night was this chaordic flow class.  I had heard from people that it was a unique class and like no other yoga class that had been previously taught at the studio.  To me, unique can be good.  Since I’ve been practicing yoga for quite some time now, I thought that this class would be easy and that ‘unique’ just meant not as difficult as the regular vinyasa flow classes.  Uh yeah, WRONG!

Image Credit – innerstrengthyoga.com

When I walked into class, there were only a few students.  I didn’t recognize any of their faces and figured that they must be new to the studio.  And since I assumed they were new, I assumed that the class was going to be taught at a beginner’s level.  Yeah, not so much.  When the class started, the instructor, Aaron Cantor, introduced himself and told the class that this wasn’t going to be a traditional flow class and that it was going to be more of a body movement class.  Interesting…That said, class began and things started off pretty slow.  We practiced shifting our weight from one foot to the other and then from one arm to the other.  And then we were asked to close our eyes and balance on one foot and to keep switching back and forth from one side to the other.  And then with our eyes still closed and while standing on one leg, we had to bring the other leg to the front and then swing it to the back.  We did this for about a minute and then switched to the other side.  I felt so silly doing this and I immediately started to giggle.  While the idea of balancing on one leg and then the other with our eyes closed didn’t seem that difficult, in reality, it truly was.  Aaron said for us to feel as if we were ‘mildly drunk people’ trying to find our way.  This is exactly how I felt!  I kept stumbling over myself and having to drop my leg down to catch my balance.  I was embarrassed that I just couldn’t keep up.  While I was laughing on the outside, I was starting to panic on the inside.

Image Credit – theschoolfortao.com

After practicing a number of different sequences of balancing on one leg, we began getting lower to the ground.  We then started gliding back and forth on our hands and feet (think crab walk) and doing these moves that certainly did not remind me of yoga.  It felt more like a combination of breakdancing and capoeira, neither of which I know how to do or have ever practiced (well, I did bust a few pop n’ locks when I was about 10 years old, and not very well, but that doesn’t count).  Needless to say, I was lost and felt confused watching Aaron demonstrate these movements and then trying to recreate them myself.  My body just wasn’t used to moving that way and I felt awkward.  I was used to being in the front of the class and being able to nail just about every pose.  But in this class, the poses were nailing me (TWSS).  To top it all off, my heart began racing, my breathing quickened and I was sweating my buns off.  But Aaron kept reminding us that it was normal to feel out of place and that we often times try too hard to control our movements and our environment, and that when we let go and just let our bodies do their thing, it’s not easy.  Yowzers, you can say that again, Aaron! I felt like a jellyfish floating around in the ocean;  I was all over the place!

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Image Credits – runboard.com &  sites.google.com

This class that I thought was going to be ‘easy’, actually ended up being one of the toughest yoga classes I’ve ever taken.  The postures and sequences themselves were not difficult; I just wasn’t used to feeling out of control.  As Aaron had mentioned in class, much of the yoga that is taught in this country is very linear and static.  We tend to move from front-to-back and from pose-to-pose without there being much fluidity or flow in between.  Aaron’s goal was to help us find the balance within us, not by forcing it, but by really feeling it.  I’m used to putting my body into poses that I know I can do and with which I am familiar.  I wouldn’t say that I ‘force’ myself into my poses and into my flexibility, but I certainly have an idea in mind as to what I’m supposed to ‘look’ like.  Thus, while I was feeling my way through these new movements, I felt some chaos occurring in my body and in my mind.  But for me to be able to find my balance and to find some peace and order in my whole self, I had to just let myself go. Even my ujjayi breath, which I’m so conditioned to turn on as soon as I step foot on the mat, had to be changed.  It was humbling to feel like a complete beginner in class.  I had to truly devote myself to listening and learning.  Everything was new to me and I had to see the class with different eyes.  I had to take my skill and strength that I’ve developed over my years of practice and combine it with a desire to learn.   It wasn’t easy, but it’s certainly an act worth balancing.

Random Question: Do you like bagels?  If so, what is your favorite way to eat one?  Or, what is your favorite flavor of bagel?

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Namasté,
Nicole

Aside from the common questions and comments like, “why do you practice yoga so much?“, “you must be like a pretzel by now with all the yoga you do,” “can you put your leg behind your head?” and “I can’t practice yoga because I’m not flexible“, people are generally pretty intrigued whenever I talk about my heaven on Earth.  They are generally quite curious as to what it is about yoga that draws me in.  They want to understand my passion; they want to see why I am so in love with my practice.

Image Credits – fitsugar.com

It’s difficult for me to put into words the way I feel when I am on my mat.  It’s not that I don’t have the words in my vocabulary to describe my feelings, it’s that there just isn’t one way I feel when I’m practicing.  Sometimes I will walk into the bamboo floored studio and onto my mat and feel like I’m going to have the most amazing practice and after about five minutes into class, I feel less than stellar.  And sometimes, I will walk into class with only having four hours of sleep and a growling stomach and I will think class will definitely be a challenge and I end up having a strong and invigorating practice.  There isn’t a recipe or formula (at least not one that I am aware of) that makes for having the ‘ideal’ class or practice.  Every time one steps onto the mat, it’s a completely separate event from the previous practices.  And while I’ve been practicing for over eight years, I never find a yoga class to be ‘easy’.  But then again, if it was easy, I might not find the journey so worthwhile.

Image Credit – squidoo.com

Because the type of yoga I practice is heated (the average temperature of the the studio is 95 degrees), I tend to sweat - a lot.  And while sweating helps to detoxify the body, allows for deeper stretching and increases the heart rate for a better cardiovascular workout, it can also make you feel uncomfortable.  But just how uncomfortable you’ll be or what degree of discomfort occurs will vary from one person to the next.  For me, it’s never the same and I’m never 100% comfortable.  Whether it be the sweat that is dripping from every orifice from my body or the fact that I can no longer hold a pose because the muscles in my thighs are burning, my practice is never a cakewalk.  Even if I do come to class almost every day, it never gets any easier.  But, I don’t believe that we, as humans, can truly find ourselves until we are pushed to our edge.  For that reason, I revel in my discomfort.

Image Credit – macabrefitness.wordpress.com

In life when we get too comfortable or things get too easy, we have a tendency to not want to challenge ourselves.  But then again, when in life do things get too easy?  When do we find ourselves being too comfortable?  And because life isn’t predictable, we just never know what is coming our way – good or bad.  Thus, when we do find ourselves in a situation where things may not be as comfortable as we would like and we are experiencing discomfort, we need to find a way to work through what is going on in our lives and find peace within the chaos.

Many people who practice at the studio to which I belong complain about the heat.  They feel that the extreme heat takes away from their practice and makes them lose focus.  At first, I agreed and felt that when it is too hot or when we become so drenched with our own perspiration, that it does become harder to concentrate.  However, I have noticed that when I am in class and I am tired, overheated, maybe even a little nauseous and I feel as if I can’t push myself anymore, that is when I learn the most about myself and when I find my inner strength.  It is at that moment, when I feel so completely outside of my comfort zone, that I have that split second to decide how I want to proceed.  Do I want to surrender? Do I want to panic? Or do I take a deep breath and figure out how I can achieve peacefulness amidst all the disorder? No matter which answer I choose, I know I am choosing based on what my body feels, and not on an involuntary reaction.  And if the heat is too overwhelming or I am just too exhausted, I know I can take child’s pose and give myself the time I need to refocus.  Regardless, I make my decision according to how I feel and what I feel is right for me.

Image Credit – bodybynamaste.com

It is my yoga practice that helps to teach me that life is not always going to be seamless and without conflict.  I have learned that even though I practice close to every day, the poses are not going to all of the sudden be easy for me.  I may be able to transition into them with less difficulty than when I first started my practice, but it certainly will not be without effort.  As in life, if you are constantly being placed in a predicament that makes you feel awkward, you are not going to suddenly like that situation just because it happens on a frequent basis.  Instead, you learn how to deal with your surroundings and the feelings and emotions that come along with that situation.  You learn to find pleasure within the displeasure and how you can grow from your current state in order to proceed with your next stage in life.  And while for some that might not be their idea of fun or something they want to experience every day, but for me, I find it quite comforting – almost as comforting as putting my leg behind my head.

Do you feel as if you can learn something about yourself when you’re put in a difficult situation? What have you learned about yourself (or about life) through exercise?

Namasté,
Nicole